Dear Service Person / Store Clerk / Inconsiderate Person on the Subway / Anonymous Car Driver Who Pissed Me Off Today / “Friend” on Facebook,
For whatever reason (fear / politeness / respect for social norms / conformist tendencies) I was unable or unwilling to confront you directly about my feelings of victimhood thanks to your insensitive ignorant / appalling / boring behavior.
Simply put, you shocked me / hurt my feelings / mildly annoyed me, and then our encounter ended, and I did nothing in response, or what I did do was ineffective at resolving my feelings, and now I am left dealing with these profound psychic wounds on my own.
Because I have no pillow to beat mercilessly as a means of releasing some of the rage and anger this incident has triggered in the deepest parts of my soul, I have decided to share your ungracious and tactless behavior with ALL my Facebook friends. Maybe some of them know you, or frequent your eating establishment / place of business / car wash / fb timeline.
Well, now they will all know what a gigantic prick / bitch you are.
I hope you are sorry now.
If you are my true and sincere IRL friends, I hope you will ‘like’ this status because that will make me feel much better.